Tuscan Tomato Soup

Yum Yum Yum.  Saw this recipe made on Good Things Utah one day.  Give it a try.


(From the Chef’s Table Restaurant)

Ingredients:

3 Tbs. Olive Oil

2 Lg Onions, small dice

5 Cups Tomatoes, diced and seeded

2 Cups Chicken Stock

1.5 Cups Heavy Whipping Cream

1 Cup Basil Pesto

TT Salt and Pepper

Method:

Heat Oil in a medium large soup pot.

Add onions and cook over moderately low heat until completely translucent.

Add Tomatoes and allow to warm to a simmer.

Add Chicken stock.

Bring to a simmer and allow to simmer for 15 minutes to allow for an interchange of flavors.

Add Pesto.

Blend to desired consistency in a food processor or blender.

Add Whipping Cream.

Salt and Pepper to taste.

Yawn

I am so so so so so tired this week.  I really wish I could just take off a couple days to rest.  :(

Super Duper

I feel like a successful mom today.  I did a "project" with my kids.  We made watches, a crown, and a super-hero mask.  We also ran/walked around our neighborhood in the nice weather.  Canon wore his cape on the walk and I think it helped motivate him to keep moving.  He says he needs to go to the Spider Man tea party with his friend, the princess (Tae).  I wasn't a perfect mom and yes, I did get frustrated at times; but I can identify moments of fun and love.  That's success in my book.  Tonight we will be talking about the Proclamation on the Family for FHE.  It'll go something like this: "What are mommy's supposed to do? What are daddy's supposed to do?  What are kids supposed to do?"  And then we'll sing and draw a picture.  It'll be great.

p.s. Ben was a very successful provider today, as well.  We deserve an award.  Or at least a candy bar and an hour of Chuck on tv.  :)

P.P.S.  I didn't mention Keller... he's a grump, cuz he only slept 45 minutes all day.  Maybe a tooth?

Working at home. I want it to work.

Hey - This is Ben (just wanted to clarify because I don't write much)

Sorry to get all soap boxy on you but why is it that my job has to take up so much time? Everyone everywhere says they'd never look back on there life and say "I wish I spent more time with my job". I thought that if I owned my own company that I would be able to find ways to spend less time at work and more time with my family. The more I try to do that it just results in less money and therefore more stress and pressure to work. I know money isn't everything but in our society that's all they'll except for payment.

I work from home so yes I'm with my family all day but that doesn't mean I get to do fun stuff with them all day. I like seeing my family during the day and I want to keep it that way but I'm finding that it seems to make it harder to work. I don't think its because they're distracting or too loud or love me too much that they can't keep themselves from coming over once and a while to say hi or that they shoved there brother into the wall and for some reason he's crying. I like all that, it makes life more interesting. I think its more the fact that I see them and I don't want to work, I want to be home and I'm forcing my self to work and less focused on it.

I think its the same on the other side. When I'm home I see the computer and I start thinking about all the things I need to get done or didn't get done and I'm totally not focused on being a good father or husband. Its really frustrating because I want to work from home but I don't know how to train my mind to do it. Does anybody know a "Home based business mind consultant"? Because I really need one.

Amber and I have thought of a few things that might help and have helped before such as me going to the library to work some days of the week or maybe putting some kind of barrier between the "office room" and the rest of the house. Our last result is for me to work somewhere else all day just like a "normal" job but I'm shooting for something better. I'm looking for a way to make life better and still live comfortably. I understand that life is going to always have its stresses and hard times and I feel like thats where I'm at so I must be doing something right because if it wasn't hard it would be worth it.

If anyone that reads this has any suggestions that would help me be able to have a more balanced work life while working at home please feel free to add your suggestions. I don't want to work somewhere else, I want to be home with my family.

Oh my goodness; Are you kidding me?

I had bookmarked this site from a while ago because it had cute kid decor.  Today I checked out the home page and was shocked by the topic of their featured article.  "Do you think it's ok to smoke weed at a playdate?"  Are you kidding me?  Really!  Holy cow.

Cookie?  Yeah, that's one magazine I won't be subscribing to.  Ever.

The dreaded 4 am

(Completely random photo)

Oh man, four in the morning and I am a-wake.  I got up to go to the bathroom an hour ago and, for some crazy reason, I can't fall back to sleep.  My brain started planning "music time" for Relief Society and my fingers wanted to practice a hymn (seriously, laying on my tummy, my hands were playing "Come Ye Children of the Lord" under my pillow) and I could not turn it off.  Tried the couch, no progress.  Tried to tell myself, "Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep," but that didn't help.  Grrr, it makes me frusterated.

Normally, I would read.  But I finished my intense Court drama yesterday, The Simple Truth, which rocked, by the way, after reading The Life of Pi last week.  Waiting on deck is The Saddlemaker's Wife, which doesn't look too promising based on the cover.  No reading tonight.

As I was laying on the couch, and trying not to fall into the spaces between the couch cushions, I was thinking about googling yoga routines and home pedicures.  Then I laughed as I realized I've been googling my whole life (even before the internet was a big deal) by using the Topical Guide in the scriptures.  Really, so similar.  I choose my search term and am presented with a variety of options, all a little abbreviated.  I "click" on one to see if it's what I need (lots of times the number one option isn't a match) and then return to my "search results" for another page to maybe answer my inquiry.  Ha, it's so funny to me how I use these two search engines to answer the questions of my life.  (Maybe this won't sound so insightful once the sun comes up.)

My eyes are tired, but my brain is--ugh--go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep!

White noise

Most commonly heard phrase in the Peck household is a tie between:

"I'm still hungry."  and  "Can I play a PBS game?"

The internet is free, but the groceries are getting pricey.

My baby turned 1

Warning: I get all goo-goo-y when I talk about Keller.  He's my baby and I just adore his chubby little self.  Today he turned one year old.

Keller seemed like a long-awaited blessing, since my pregnancy before him ended in miscarriage.  We were wishing for a baby and I was praying for a little peacemaker in our home, a little joyful child.  I got pretty impatient during the last trimester, too, when everyone kept asking if I was due yet - and my tummy was so gigantic.

Finally he came.  I went into labor watching John Bytheway on tv (That image is burned in my head) around 8:00 at night and Keller arrived at 2 am.  We were so thrilled to have him.  And now my little angel has been in our home for whole year now.

He's grown so much.  Today, he walks, points, claps, waves, bounces, crawls, dives down steps, eats very cautiously-- I think he said hello today... He's just so so big.

Oh... that makes me so sad, though.  I don't feel like I paid enough attention, that there were things I maybe missed, and now his whole first year is over.  I hope I'll be able to remember what my sweet little boy was like as a baby.  I just love him so.

I know, so so gushy.  But truly, Keller Davis has been a blessing in my life.  Sometimes I think that my depression is the price I had to pay to be able to have Kel in my life; if so, it is so worth it.  I would suffer anything to have that boy in my arms.  He is a joy and a peacemaker in our home.  He makes me smile every single day.

Happy Birthday, Keller Bug; Mommy loves you so much.

Real Simple Recipe

Check out this Super Yummy Pizza Recipe that we had for dinner tonight.  We make it with our own homemade pizza dough; de-lish.

Just another manic monday

Ben and I are exhausted.  We were dragging ourselves out of bed this morning; apparently our weekend wasn't as restful as it should have been.  It just boggles my mind when I see how chipper the kids are at 7 am.  What's their deal?  But really it makes sense, since all three of them are asleep by 8:00 every night; Ben and I sometimes doze off around 11:15.  Maybe we need to make an adjustment to our routine.

Keller discovered that he can lift the toilet seat.  Just this morning I found him with both hands in the water and I thought, "Oh no, not this phase again."  

Canon thinks he owns the refrigerator.  He just informed me that he has spilled apple juice on the table, floor, and himself.

Good news, I actually look cute today.  Don't think that I'm conceited--this is really a huge deal for me.  The days when I feel cute are few and far between.  I guess that as I wash my baby's potty-hands and wipe up the juicy floor with my oh-so-tired self, at least I can feel pretty.  :)

On the brink of burntness

 I have gotten migraines the past two days; misery.  Too much in my head.  Lists and jobs and things to do.  Where do I begin?

Day one on the Alien Planet

There was a glass of water sitting on my bed stand that was just bound to cause trouble.  Funny how I ended up being the one who knocked it over onto... well everything.

It's the first real day of the New Year.  Y'know with working and school and all the usuals.  It has officially begun.  And there's... well a ton going on in our lives that makes starting anew so much different than it's ever been.  We're dog paddling for our lives here, people.

I am starting 2010 coming to terms with the fact that I am a person with depression.  Frankly, I thought I would be past this by now; I thought I could outsmart this thing and move on.  Tricky disease, that depression, though - I'm doing the absolute best that I know how - and I've come a long way - but this keeps on following me around.  It's a fight, and a really tiring one at that.  I know a few people who have dealt with depression for years, and I hate to think that maybe this is my trial from here on out, but I've seen that it's possible.  Everyone gets their own burdens, right?  I'm beginning to see that this is mine.

The kids and I watched a "Jesus movie" on Sunday (one of those animated stories from the scriptures.)  It happened to be the story of Samuel the prophet and the sign of Christ's birth.  The believers were waiting for the sign, the night with no darkness, and the non-believers were threatening to kill them if it didn't happen.  But the believers prayed and had faith - a TON of faith in my opinion.  They just knelt there and said, I'm paraphrasing, "If it comes, great, but if not, we will die knowing that we were true to our God."  Ben and I are reaching for this kind of faith.

He's self-employed.  He's the whole company.  There is no back up plan.  And here we are kneeling and praying that we will survive paying our bills this month, and doubting oh so much.  I remember from when I was a kid, though, that even a desire to believe is better than nothing.  Ben's working so hard.

Maybe it sounds like puny stuff to some, but our lives are so different this January; I feel like I'm walking through uncharted land.  But the journey has been successful so far.  Day one is coming to an end.  The moments to hang on to:

We all got ready today,
Canon buckled his own carseat (the top buckle at least) once,
Taesya got to and from preschool,
we made pizza together without yelling,
Ben got in a full day's work,
dishes got done,
a load of laundry was put away,
instead of giving up on the day, I helped the kids with an art project
we sang songs together,
I didn't spend any unnecessary money at Harmons,
Keller walked greater distances than ever before.

Truly it was a monumental day.  I found this really great quote in a book I'm reading.  The book is called Life of Pi, and the main character says this of life:

"I speak in all modesty as I say this, but I discovered at that moment that I have a fierce will to live.  It's not something evident, in my experience.  Some of us give up on life with only a resigned sigh.  Others fight a little, then lose hope.  Still others--and I am one of those--never give up.  We fight and fight and fight.  We fight no matter the cost of battle, the losses we take, the improbability of success.  We fight to the very end.  It's not a question of courage.  It's something constitutional, an inability to let go."

We can do this.