Our Little Trickster

Two Sundays in a row now, we've woken up early early to "labor." Last week was pretty minor, but I did get my hopes up and lose a lot of sleep. This week we actually ended up at the hospital, only to be sent home.

That Keller sure had us fooled. Big contractions 3 minutes apart, in the middle of the night, the feeling that 'this is the day.' My dad came over so the kids could stay in bed and we headed to the hospital at around 4 in the morning. (Thanks so much to my family, by the way, for being so supportive and positive during all this.) We've never been sent home from the hospital before, so we were beyond disappointed when they told us I was only dilated to a 1.5 and Keller hadn't even descended into my pelvis yet. They let us try to progress for an hour and then sent us down the walk of shame back to our car.

Still nothing since then. No baby, that's for sure. He could come tomorrow or in 3 weeks, it's anybody's guess. But next Sunday, when I wake up to contractions, it's gunna take something major for me to believe this kid again. Already our son is keeping us on our toes. What a roller coaster labor can be.

Hope you all had a Merry Christmas. Our's was wonderful and just what we needed. Thank goodness for family, joy, and holidays.

Dear Santa

The kids sat on Santa's lap at our Primary Activity. They were both very brave; I was surprised. Taesya asked for a Tinkerbell toy and Canon asked for a toy. Santa told them that they would have to be very good girls and boys. It was a lot of fun to see how proud they were of their Santa visit.

All I Want...

1. I want Christmas to come so badly. I need the distraction, the people, the noise. There's just a feeling of comfort in being surrounded by family for two days, like a big warm bubble. It just can't come fast enough for me or my kids. I almost let them open up presents yesterday... this is very hard for me.

2. I want Ben to find a great new job. He had an interview yesterday, which is encouraging. The kids and I are praying every day.

3. And I want Keller to come join our family. He's running out of room, I can tell, so he should come out where there's space to play. Maybe he's avoiding the snow, in which case, I completely understand.

Mmm... Christmas

Last night Ben took the kids to do some errands. I had the greatest moment of peace and contentment. Listening to an Amy Grant CD, savoring ice cream on the couch, and watching the twinkle of our Christmas tree - I could finally breathe, and relax. Alone with my thoughts. For lack of a more eloquent description, it was wonderful.

The Thursday Blues

It's a Thursday and I'm burnt out. I was exhausted from the moment I woke up. Everything seems like a mess around here and I can't bend over to clean it up. I just can't take the constant noise any more, either. If they're not fighting, they're whining; if they're not whining, they're repeating the same comment and/or request over and over and over... I just really need the munchkin voices to stop. Please. Mess and Noise and just overall bad mood-ness around here.

The problem is that I don't know how to recharge. I could feel the blues coming on last night and I told Ben about it, but I had no solution to nip the grumpiness in the bud. How do I reset mentally? Clear out all the spam from the week thus far and begin anew? I don't know how, and now I am slumping.

My brain needs a breath of mental fresh air. My spirit, too. Or else the forecast for tomorrow does not look promising.