Dream

It was a boy. He was so tiny and adorable and quiet. I was just going about my life carrying him around when he showed some interest in the red punch Taesya was drinking. She gave some to him and he drank like a child dying of thirst. Then it hit me - I hadn't fed him. When was the last time I had? What day was it? We'd been home from the hospital a week already!?! I only remember feeding him once.

So I fed that sweet little boy and he fell asleep satisfied. But it just ripped out my heart that he had suffered in silence for so long. What a terrible mother I was. Living my life like normal while my son was starving...

*** These are the dreams you have when you're pregnant. This was my first one this time around. When I woke up I just held Taesya and patted her hair while she watched tv. Am I ready for this new baby? Parenthood scares the heck out of me sometimes.